Unsure

Don't really know how else to describe it. I am not at all uncertain about what I want or where I want life to go... Just uneasy I suppose that creator is going to let it happen this easy if I just do my part . The hope being that the character lessons, not the least of which being the integrity piece, are truly indeed the missing link on my part and that with those firmly in check and a keen awareness of them, the rest really will fall into place. It just seems to easy. I can't help but wait for the hidden cameras, catch 22, "haha just kidding", or insurmountable 'real' challenge to pop out of the bushes. Will this ever subside? Its not paranoia or insecurity... It sends to be simple disbelief... Genuinely not even out of mistrust. It just never works out that well in my story... Sure would be cool if it does though...